Anger / Grief

Anger

Anger is, for many people, the emotion they can access the easiest and the one that very temporarily leaves you feeling empowered.  But, anger often comes to the surface to protect us from a deeper emotion such as vulnerability, grief, hurt, or helplessness.

The problem with anger is that it blows the other person away and, in many cases, it feels like a physical blow even when it’s just a verbal response. And therein lies the problem: it achieves the opposite of what you wish would happen. Instead of communicating your pain or hurt it pushes the other person away.

When the person you are interacting with, is trying to protect themselves from your wrath, it is close to impossible for them to recognize and have empathy for the real feelings lurking below the surface. In fact, anger can be so destructive that it destroys relationships, both personal and professional.

We work with you to be able to express your feelings, including your anger or disappointment is an assertive rather than an aggressive or passive aggressive manner. We do that by helping you to develop more positive (rather than negative) communication skills.

We call it emotional strength training. It helps you to get your needs met and to develop the courage to express those more vulnerable emotions.

Grief

We all grieve. It may be over the loss of a loved one, a pet, a relationship, a job or even something less cataclysmic such as the theft of a bicycle.

Often that grief is so uncomfortable that we will do anything and everything  to distract ourselves from it.

Exercise, eating, long hours at the office, drinking and/or drugs are common distractions. But that is what they are distractions; you cannot avoid or escape grief.

It follows you and knows your forwarding address until you work through it. And we help you work through the stages of grief so that it doesn’t transform into depression.

If this sounds like you, we can help. Call us.